Whenever David was in a bad way, he would go down to the pit.

I wish I at least had a pit to go down to.

My attempt at humor right now. :-)

...Praying for visible signs of God's mercy -- coming SOON! And pleading for them. I don't know how much longer I can wait...it has gotten so hard again. I have forgotten what it feels like to be happy. "I have sunk in deep mire; a flood overflows me"! "My eyes fail while I wait for my God." I am so thankful that David felt so overwhelmed with misery and wrote about it! Everything is so horrible right now that it would be hard to for me to believe that God could make things right again, if someone else hadn't also felt this way and seen deliverence.

"Has God forgotten to be gracious?" I love that David asked questions like this! It's as if he is saying "I KNOW that God is merciful...but has He forgotten?"

I am desperate for God's mercy in the healing of my flesh. In that area, I have been hit with constant waves, and the one that is persistent is the hardest of all -- and when will it go away, and can I take even another week of it? I miss my kids. To tears. I am tormented with grief, so often wanting to know what to do with so much suffering. All this suffering and the necessity of it is a mystery...all the answers of scripture still leave the sufferer asking "why"? There is a depth of it that heaven keeps for us to know only when we are home.

Praying that I will stand strong, take courage, not grow weary...and hold fast to HOPE, for God IS FAITHFUL!!

P.S. John says that next year I'm going to have a blog called "A Land Sown". I love how he encourages me -- and makes me laugh!! Praise God for that, what would I do without him.



"In our frustration we cry out to the heavens. We shake our fists at the sky, demanding that He act, move, fix, heal. We insist that God be faithful according to our expectations of what faithfulness should look like. We who have exhibited so little faithfulness in our own lives have the audacity to believe we know what it should look like for Him. My mentor, Dr. William Lane, used to say, "We want the God of the magic wand. The God who makes the cancer go away. But more remarkably, He is the God who comes alongside us and suffers with us. He is the God who never leaves us."
-- Michael Card, The Hidden Face of God



Where is Your mercy, Lord?
“Will the Lord spurn forever,
and never again be favorable?
Has his steadfast love forever ceased?
Are his promises at an end for all time?
Has God forgotten to be gracious?
Has he in anger shut up his compassion?”

Then I said, “I will appeal to this,
to the years of the right hand of the Most High.”

I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
yes, I will remember your wonders of old.
I will ponder all your work,
and meditate on your mighty deeds
Your way, O God, is holy.
What god is great like our God?
You are the God who works wonders;
you have made known your might among the peoples.
You with your arm redeemed your people,
the children of Jacob and Joseph.
--Psalm 77